Win Tickets ($50): Steel Panther – Lower The Bar Tour @ Crystal Ballroom | Comedic Glam Metal Band

We are giving away a pair of tickets to Steel Panther – Lower The Bar Tour @ Crystal Ballroom on January 12. To win, comment on this post why you’d like to attend. Winner will be drawn and emailed Monday, January 8.


From our sponsors:
Steel Panther – Lower The Bar Tour
January 12, 2018
6:30 p.m. Doors, Show 8 p.m. | $23 advance, $25 day of show | 21+
More info:

Crystal Ballroom
1332 W Burnside St, Portland, OR 97209

The title of Steel Panther’s third full-length album, All You Can Eat, came from a dream.

However, it wasn’t a dream Martin Luther King had or even any of the band members-Michael Starr [lead singer], Satchel [guitarist], Lexxi Foxx [bass], and Stix Zadinia [drums]-for that matter.

“Believe it or not, the title came from a girl that I was [with],” admits Satchel. “She fell asleep next to me on the tour bus. She woke up and told me she had a dream that we called the album, All You Can Eat. She was really hot, and she had great tits. I decided I was going to steal the title from her and not tell her. I kicked her off the bus. She can’t do jack shit about it. She’s probably living in a trailer park somewhere. It’s a great title though.”

More importantly, that moniker fits this rock ‘n’ roll opus like a condom-not that Steel Panther practice or condone safe sex though. No, All You Can Eat is raw, raucous, and righteous heavy metal in its finest form. The Los Angeles quartet upholds the pillars of its sound. There are badass riffs aplenty, arena-size grooves, lyrics about sex, drugs, and senior citizens, and the lingering scent of whisky, a stripper’s perfume, and hairspray. In order to capture all of this, the band began writing immediately after they got off the road behind their sophomore effort, Balls Out, their second album to debut at #1 on Billboards Comedy Albums Chart.

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33 Responses to Win Tickets ($50): Steel Panther – Lower The Bar Tour @ Crystal Ballroom | Comedic Glam Metal Band

  1. Karl Michael jacobson December 26, 2017 at 4:36 pm #

    Yes, Please and Thank You !!!

  2. Michael December 26, 2017 at 5:50 pm #

    With songs like “Weenie Ride”, “It Won’t Suck Itself” & my personal favorite “Gangbang At The Old Folks Home” who wouldn’t want to go. Plus The Crystal Ballroom is an awesome venue to see them at.

  3. Rich Faltyn December 26, 2017 at 11:27 pm #

    I’m all in!!

  4. Marcus December 27, 2017 at 5:47 am #

    I was hooked when they sung “Gloryhole.” It was relatable and held a special place in my heart, unlike where I decided to place my head that faithful night. I only regret that I haven’t found the band sooner.

  5. Marc December 27, 2017 at 9:16 am #

    I would love to see them live! this would be such a great show!

  6. Mike December 27, 2017 at 2:31 pm #

    This would be like going back to 1985 and revisiting all of those great buttrock bands of the era. I want to win these tickets so bad!

  7. Colette December 27, 2017 at 3:34 pm #

    Sounds like a good time. Yes please!

  8. William Longnecker December 27, 2017 at 3:38 pm #

    I’ve been looking for a reason to wear spandex and make poor life decisions all year!!

  9. DT December 27, 2017 at 5:22 pm #

    Satchel Guitar lesson included?

  10. Dorothy Placencio December 27, 2017 at 6:03 pm #

    I love Steel Panther! I would love to see them live!

  11. Jennifer December 27, 2017 at 10:49 pm #

    It’s hump day today and, in honor of this prolific band, I am entering to win ON THIS DAY!

  12. Jamie December 28, 2017 at 2:45 pm #

    Please and Thank You!

  13. Ted M December 28, 2017 at 3:11 pm #

    I missed them in Seattle a couple years ago and was hoping they would make it back to the Northwest. Would love to attend this show. Thanks for the chance.

  14. Jesse December 28, 2017 at 3:58 pm #

    I’m entering… Phrasing!

  15. Dave G. December 28, 2017 at 7:57 pm #

    Steel Panther is the cats meow!

  16. Frank Byers December 28, 2017 at 8:33 pm #

    Because I haven’t seen Motley Crüe or Faster Pussycat, two of my faves.

  17. Lisa Marie December 29, 2017 at 3:01 am #

    Steel Panther is da stuff!!!! Hilarious!!

  18. Dawn December 29, 2017 at 1:19 pm #

    Steel Panther! Hilarious!

  19. Zachary Swigart December 31, 2017 at 5:46 pm #

    Glam metal is amazing, if love to see these guys, they’re hilarious

  20. Josh G January 2, 2018 at 12:08 pm #


  21. sonya January 2, 2018 at 12:19 pm #

    Yes, palease!

  22. Stephanie Celin January 2, 2018 at 12:50 pm #

    Getting free tickets would make a very sad 46 year old orphaned metal head very happy.

  23. wallace January 2, 2018 at 12:53 pm #

    I wanna go see Steel Panther and already bought tickets, but would love to take some non believing friends too,

  24. CHRIS MILLER January 2, 2018 at 1:56 pm #


  25. Colleen January 2, 2018 at 2:43 pm #

    Community Property in person – yes, please!

  26. Nicole Cascella January 2, 2018 at 3:16 pm #

    Look, I’m just here for the party. Let me in, please. I know the DJ.

  27. Cindy Early McDermid January 3, 2018 at 11:30 am #

    What the hell. I’m desperate for a night of grown-up fun with my husband, both of us 80’s rockers. It’s time for us to grow the fuck up and join this decade. Pick me please!

  28. Nikki January 4, 2018 at 2:42 pm #

    My friend loves these guys, she would love a night out

  29. Mark Schmidt January 4, 2018 at 2:55 pm #

    I have a first date that weekend. This would be the best first date litmus test I could imagine.

  30. Marvin January 4, 2018 at 4:07 pm #

    REPLY. (That’s what you asked for—do I win?) These other people overthought the whole thing. WOW I gotta say that I was going to carry on with a comedic paragraph or two, incorporating the names of their songs. I’m actually a semi genius when it comes to that. However, after looking up all the titles, it occurred to me that this isn’t what I first wanted—a cool live concert with my younger daughter who has not been to a live concert, just DJ events. No gentle readers, its a lesson in sex education but from the other end (pun intended) Weird Al couldn’t even do anything with the tiles or lyrics! At any rate, please pick me so I can take my daughter, age 21, to hear it all. Then I will either have a SHITLOAD of explaining to do or she will no longer have questions about anything, having learned from a very cool (I’m an ex flower child) band with steaming but clever lyrics, and I’ll never have to have the dreaded birds and bees talk with her. Hey—maybe after some of those songs she will give up thinking about anything to do with sex and I wont have to chase young studs around to keep them away from her!

    So what will it be? Help me out here. Ill post her reaction. It will either be EEWWWWW or Holy Shit I love the Steel Panthers!
    I actually get a big kick out of them and would love to see them live.

  31. Amanda January 6, 2018 at 3:58 pm #

    Yes please! So entertaining!!

  32. Kaeli plaks January 7, 2018 at 12:26 am #

    Would love to jam! Love you guys

  33. David January 8, 2018 at 11:00 am #

    Parody personified!

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