IKEAnsanity – The Story by Brian Brewcaster

New arrival to PDX, Brian Brewcaster, sent this story over about the IKEA-nsanityâ¬Å¾¢ that has gripped Portland.
Let me get this out of the way first:

My wife and I had to be at the PDX Airport at 6:00am today. We happened to notice that Ikea was opening the store today. Traffic did not look bad at all, so we decided to at least do a “drive-by”. We ended up staying to witness the ceremonies.

We had to circle Ikea once to find the “parking lot” they were using. To avoid traffic insanity, they had the actual Ikea parking lot blocked off. They had patrons parking in a huge field designed for light off-road occasions.

As we approached on foot, we were greeted by hundreds of people lined up in a queue the likes of Space Mountain.

Things I saw:

  • Trampoline team doing stunts,
  • guy on stilts juggling,
  • dood dressed as a moose,
  • workers dressed in Swedish(not the hot kind) outfits giving out Ikea shwag
  • they raised the American flag and sung the national anthem
  • they also raised the Swedish flag and had someone sing their national anthem.
  • A current or former mayor sawed a log to open the store I believe–I couldn't see.

I think the first 250 people entering the store got a surprise gift card, with up to $250 in it. Ours had buy one get one free food items from the food station thing.
People were camped out. I heard some people saying things, like “oh we got here about 2am! What for??”

The weirdness continued as we entered the store and were greeted by at least 100 employees lining the entrance screaming, clapping, banging those inflatable tubes you see at basketball games together, slapping people high five as they entered the store and got on an escalator. I was not greeted with this much praise for graduating college.

My wife and I got the swivel TV stand for our new TV we were looking to buy, and a cheap rug which we also planned on buying, and we got out of there. It was definitely one of the weirdest “events” I have been to.

Free stuff received while waiting in line:
Frisbees(for the dogs to chew on)
water bottle(for the dogs to chew on)
a little battery powered fan
a little magnetic toy, you know the one where the wheel goes up and down, never mind.
a measuring tape key chain.
fake tattoos
we had to start declining the offers from there.

You can see more/larger photos here and my website: www.brewcaster.com

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0 Responses to IKEAnsanity – The Story by Brian Brewcaster

  1. Solon July 25, 2007 at 6:03 pm #

    I got lost inside the massive IKEA here in Melbourne, and while searching endlessly for the exit, I noticed an extremely high proportion of pregnant women with their men being dragged behind. It must be a hormone thing.

    Also, I could help but notice that it seems to be pretty easy to get into arguements with ones spouse while browsing IKEA, I wonder if an unusually large proportion of relationships don’t end there as well?

  2. Julian Chadwick July 25, 2007 at 10:35 pm #

    “It must be a hormone thing.”

    Or an Australian thing?

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